Filed under: Miscellanea
I’ve been thinking about kissing. Specifically, stage kissing. It seems a little gross that this is my next post after telling you all about my coldsores, but I suppose it’s something resembling a logical progression. (Alternatively, it may be my next downward step towards Yoko Ono-esque stream-of-conciousness abstract blogging.)
Now! I like to think that, in regular life, I am not a terrible smoocher. I have no desire to undergo any sort of testing process, so make no claims to objective greatness, but I’m at least confident that I’m substantially better at it than I was when I was 15. Nobody has ever run away or started laughing. On these grounds, I award myself the rank of ADEQUATE.
All well and good, right? No. Because then there’s stage kissing. I loves me up some theatre (particularly improvised theatre), but the second I have to kiss someone in character, I regress to the age of about 13. Suddenly, I have no memory of how kissing works at all. I have a vague idea that it involves the mashing of lips. I become gung-ho, and full of bravado. Let’s get this shit done! I launch my face in my victim’s direction (the victim usually being Dan), swooping at them repeatedly like a drunken magpie. Then I blush, because HAHAHA KISSING.
ALRIGHT, LET'S DO THIS THING*
It is not what you would describe as tender. It is also not what you would describe as particularly safe. My last effort a few weeks ago involved my character in ‘Agatha Holmes’, our murder mystery series, responding to a heartfelt declaration of love. Somehow, I managed to bite my onstage paramour’s eyebrow. I swear this on all I hold dear. The poor victim will testify. And he’s not alone. Slowly and surely, I am tattooing the male population of ImproMafia with sloppily applied lipstick. It’s weird. We’re a pretty close-knit company. It’s a bit trite and soppy and not quite true to say I think of them as family, but they’re at least my second cousins or something, so it’s still weird.
Something must be done. A flurry of ill-timed, awkward comedy kisses might work in a handful of situations, but tends to ruin serious dramatic moments. And yes, we do have them – particularly in longform shows. These run as serials, often over several seasons, which leads to stuff like actual character development and long-running relationships. In every other aspect, I like to think I can drop into character fairly thoroughly. I don’t want to break the moment by suddenly turning back into Amy.
I don’t know. I guess it’s just something I have to work on, a little speedbump of embarrassment I need to get over if I want to be a better improvisor and actor. And I do. Of course I do.
Kissing party, anyone? No? Okay. I’ll just get Ash some wigs.
* (Awkward moment captured perfectly by Kris Anderson.)
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Amy Tries Again 
Considering that most of ImproMafia’s stage kissing is almost-aggressive-homoerotic in nature, I’m pretty sure they don’t mind if you miss a lip and hit an eyebrow. The alternative is having Greg in their face. 🙂
Comment by GirlClumsy August 27, 2011 @ 11:25 AM